While there are several factors that can drive a couple to divorce, there is generally more than one reason why they decide to end their marriage. In the experience of Massachusetts divorce attorney Jay Davis, many couples often disagree as to what caused their breakup. Whatever the reason might be, if you have decided to divorce your spouse, you may want to talk to an experienced divorce lawyer especially if children or substantial assets are involved. To discuss your situation with Jay and his legal team at Davis Law Group, call us at 617-221-3548 today.
Major Reasons Why Couples Divorce in Massachusetts
It can be helpful to learn about the different reasons why marriages usually end especially if you are hoping to avoid that outcome. The following signs will help you recognize when things start to go wrong:
Lack of Commitment
One of the most common situations we see as a family law firm is, one spouse, blaming the other for not working harder to “save their marriage.” This lack of commitment is difficult to prove, and can even seem vague to the person who’s being blamed for it. The other signs of this problem that lead to a divorce include not working toward shared financial goals, and not being keen to talk about the relationship.
Growing Apart Over Time
When we ask our clients why they are ending their marriage, one common answer we get is “we drifted apart” or “we grew apart.” One other variation of this is “we were just not compatible.” This often happens if the couple married too young or experienced a lack of shared values. In some cases, religious differences or sexual difficulties can also cause incompatibility between two partners.
Although some couples live with and even enjoy their differences, most successful marriages are based on a foundation of shared values, priorities, and interests. This, coupled with poor communication can drive a wedge between the couple.
Do you feel like you are not being able to talk to your spouse? Even if your arguments with your spouse are not particularly nasty or frequent, watch out for disagreements that never really get resolved or repeated arguments about the same topics. That can be a sign that you may need help (like couple’s therapy) learning how to communicate with each other more effectively.
However, if you have already tried everything and it seems you have irreconcilable differences, it might be time to talk to a divorce attorney in Massachusetts. Attorney Jay Davis has 27+ years of experience in helping spouses navigate the challenging waters of divorce, child custody, and property division. To set up an evaluation of your case, don’t hesitate to reach out to Davis Law Group at 617-221-3548 today.
Disagreements Related to Money Matters
Financial problems are a major reason why couples split up. Here are a few signs that you and your spouse are financially unsuited:
- You cannot talk about your finances in a calm and peaceful way
- One of you doesn’t talk to the other before making large purchases
- One of you either lies or keeps secrets about financial decisions like making a big purchase, withdrawing money from savings account, or making investments
- You set financial goals together but one of you keeps sabotaging them
- The two of you won’t or can’t set common financial goals, such as building a retirement nest egg or saving to buy a house
Adultery or infidelity is another common reason why a spouse may file for divorce. For many spouses, an affair is the last straw after a series of other problems in their marriage. These other issues might be the reason why a spouse goes outside the marriage for distraction, excitement, or intimacy. In some cases, one spouse may engage in an affair simply to provoke the other — maybe unconsciously — into ending the marriage.
If your spouse has drug or drinking problems, and they are either unwilling to seek help for it or keep relapsing, a divorce might be your only option. Here are some of the most common signs that your spouse might be abusing a substance of some sort:
- Secretive behavior
- Changes in hygiene, appetite, and sleep patterns
- Sudden changes in mood
- Changes in personality (like paranoia)
- Unexplained need for extra money
- Neglecting family or work responsibilities
- Difficulties with memory or attention
If your spouse is abusing you (or your children) physically, emotionally, verbally, or sexually, you have every right to file for divorce and protect yourself and your children. One important thing to note is men and women tend to have extremely different views of domestic abuse. At our own family law firm in Massachusetts, we have seen cases where men were not even willing to admit that their behavior — as well documented as it was — towards their wives was in any way abusive.
Talk to a Massachusetts Divorce Attorney Today
If you have made up your mind to file for divorce, a seasoned and knowledgeable divorce attorney like Jay Davis can help you with the process in a way that’s fast, less costly, and less contentious. Remember, a divorce doesn’t have to be an antagonizing and lengthy battle. Jay and his team can correctly guide you through the legal aspects of the divorce and obtain a favorable outcome in terms of child custody and property division. Call us at 617-221-3548 today to set up a case evaluation.
James H. (Jay) Davis III
Thank you for reading. Need to talk? 617-221-3548